Cemetery Etiquette

Cemeteries are more than just places for the dead. Today cemeteries are some of the last remaining protected green spaces open to the public. This means that cemeteries are now being visited not only by living descendants of the deceased but by those wishing to utilize these green spaces for other leisure activities. Many cemeteries even encourage tourism and are quite happy to see new visitors stopping in to enjoy their surroundings. However the multi-use nature of cemeteries means that we need to be reminded of how to act when visiting the cemetery. To help you be mindful and respectful on your next visit to the cemetery we have put together the following list of guidelines of cemetery etiquette to ensure the cemetery can be enjoyed by everyone.

Respect the Rules of the Cemetery

Most cemeteries have a set of guidelines or rules called by-laws that can be referenced for things ranging from operational hours to the allowed items on graves. These rules can change so be sure to check back for any updates. If you are unsure about the cemetery’s rules or they do not have something physical for reference contact the cemetery.

Respect Memorials

The memorials in cemeteries are erected in honour and remembrance of the deceased. They are also quite expensive and often irreplaceable. Please do not sit on, lean, push over or allow children to play on any memorials. These memorials can become unstable overtime, and these activities not only are damaging but are dangerous and can cause serious harm. Please also be mindful of taking photographs, video or rubbings of cemetery memorials, it is best practice to get permission to do so, especially if you plan on posting to social media.

Drive Appropriately

Always follow the road and never drive over the grass. Many gravesites are close to the roadways, by taking a detour or driving around other cars you may be driving over graves. Use parking lots if they are present. Many cemeteries have single lane roadways that back onto gravesites making it quite difficult to pass parked cars. We understand that many have mobility issues that make it necessary to park closely to the area they are visiting but we just want you to be mindful of others.  Drive slowly, vehicle speeds should be kept under 20km/h and obey traffic signs, this keeps visitors and staff alike safe.

Cleanliness

All garbage including cigarette butts should be placed in appropriate receptacles if provided. Where one isn’t provided any garbage should be packed up and taken with you. Any food waste should be taken with you if possible. Most cemeteries are green spaces that are frequently visited by wild animals. These animals may be attracted to the scent of food and they may spread garbage through the cemetery in their efforts to get at the food in the bin. If the cemetery you are visiting allows dogs, it should go without saying that you should always clean up after them.

Supervise Children
While at a cemetery parents or caregivers should maintain supervision of children at all times. It is a good idea if you will be bringing children or adolescents with you to the cemetery, to discuss with them beforehand your expectations for their behavior. Explain that yelling, running around, throwing items, playing on memorials or otherwise behaving disrespectfully is inappropriate. Remind them that you will be going to a place where there will be other mourners, some of whom may have very recently lost their loved ones and that is important to respect their privacy.

Maintain the Serenity of Your Surroundings

If you are visiting the cemetery for purposes other than visiting a loved one please remember that your presence is secondary to those mourning. Avoid yelling or calling out to others, and turn down or turn off your car radio. Try not to intrude on funeral services taking place and do your best to avoid driving or walking through that area of the cemetery. Remember you are in a place of respect, peace and tranquility and you do not want to upset that by being intrusive or loud.

With these simple rules cemeteries can continue to be enjoyed by all for years to come. For more information on the Lakefield Cemetery’s By-laws call or visit the cemetery office. Alternatively you can follow this link to download a copy of our By-laws http://www.lakefieldcemetery.com/resources/cemetery-by-laws/.